September 9, 2010
How often is a family able to gather all of their members, free from other obligations, overcome geographic distance and scheduling conflicts to spend a pleasant evening together? The chance for that to happen in a large family is almost next to none. It certainly was the case on last Sunday when we attempted to have a historic first-ever family BBQ at our house. Despite missing some family members we managed to gather 6 out of 8 of my siblings and their respective families and had a total of 53 people for a back yard BBQ. It was a monumental task but the end result was well worth the effort. Just seeing the smiling faces of everyone interacting with each other, (some of them for the first time), was heartwarming and my parents would have been very proud.
Considering a good part of our family had been separated from 1950 to 1985 in two continents, not able to see one another regularly, one would wonder why we wouldn't get together more often, since almost all of us now live in California?
I had asked my sister Amy (no. 4) to buy all the necessary ingredients to make the deep-fried daikon cakes (蝦堆) at the party. This delicious little treat is of great significance to those that were born and raised in the old village in China. This is something I heard about growing up from my older siblings on how they missed tasting this little fried cake sold on street corners by vendors hovering over a small wok filled with hot oil. They would be deep frying a rice flour batter on a specially made round metal spatula with shredded daikon in the middle and topped with peanuts and dried shrimp (and hence the Chinese name 蝦堆 Ha Deui). I tasted it for the first time in my life last Sunday at the party among my family and it was DELICIOUS! Now I finally know what this is all about. It instantly brought me closer to my brothers and sisters as I always felt like an outsider being born and raised in Hong Kong.
Another important significance of the fried daikon cake marked a special meaning to our family. I found this out interviewing my brother Ji-lin (no. 3). He told me he was only 10 years old when my parents left China and he and brother Kai (no. 5) used to make this little treat to sell on street corners for a penny a piece to help support the family. I know I am ahead of myself on my story, but I can't help telling this.
The party was a huge success with great food and desserts. I found out many of the younger members (nephews and nieces) are budding chefs and brought over tasty treats.
We ended the party having each of my siblings bring their family (sons and daughters, grandchildren, their boy and girlfriends, in-laws) to center stage and have one member from each family introduce their family. It was the highlight of the party and was quite touching.
We vow to have more gatherings like this on a regular basis from now on. For not only was it fun, bringing everyone closer together, but, simply the right thing to do.
More next time.
